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Power Couples; Managing Love, Sex and Relationships

How do busy ‘power couples’ make time for their relationships? Between managing hectic work schedules, family life and social obligations, it can be a challenge to prioritize intimacy, romance and sex.

Oasis Aqualounge Marketing Director Fatima Mechtab recently interviewed Tori and Soul; a married, same-sex, female bisexual couple who work as busy professionals and who also host a podcast about their adventures within the Lifestyle. Tori and Soul share how they maintain a balance between their professional and personal lives and how they keep the passion alive, in their marriage.

Q: How did you meet and how long have you been together?

A: We met through a series of mishaps that brought us together on the dance floor, on a snowy night in January. Soul was all set to go out dancing with a friend, and at the last minute, her friend cancelled and insisted that Soul still go. She said to Soul, “You’ll probably meet the girl of your dreams.” Well, no truer words were spoken. When we saw each other, we felt instant chemistry.  Today, we still love dancing with each other, and we’ll do it for hours.


We were together for the next several years before there would be a proposal. Upon meeting us, people would be surprised that we weren’t already married, yet marriage was not something we were necessarily interested in.  We were both previously married (to men, by the way) and were in no rush to tie the knot again. Our engagement proposal was set up as a mock video shoot “for a friend” and was a complete surprise to Tori, and everyone else present for the recording.

Q:  Describe your career, as individuals. What is a typical day for you, like?

Well, in the everyday part of our lives we are entrepreneurs in business development. We offer training to those wanting to better manage their work flow, do less, and have more success. Basically, we teach people how to not make the mistakes we did! 

Currently, what we are even more excited about is our podcast. We started Torrid Souls Podcast in 2018; basically, because we were encouraged to share our take on relationships based on conversations we would normally have, with others. Our journey into ethical non-monogamy started about 3 years ago and has been an interesting and fun one, that has expanded our world in ways we never imagined.

We are curious and like to try new things, so we podcast about what we encounter. We travel and teach and share how we navigate the world of ethical non-monogamy as two women married to each other, who, when we play, it’s with single guys! 

What listeners have told us they really enjoy most about our show is the connection we have with each other. They like how vulnerable, yet how informative (and hilarious) we are. As a same-sex female couple, who are both bisexual, we may not be the norm in the lifestyle, but like many couples, sometimes we just like to spice it up too. 

Q: As a couple, what are some ways you both maintain intimacy, passion and fun in your relationship?

The 5 Love Languages is a system that helps us maintain intimacy, passion and fun in our relationship.

For those who are not familiar with them, they are: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch. Each love language is important in that it gives us concrete ways to express love. We find that it helps to create a stronger bond in our relationship.

We can achieve that feeling of closeness, express strong emotion, enjoyment or lighthearted pleasure through these love languages. 

We love touch, and the obvious pleasures of intimate, physical touch. There are also the more subtle ways of using physical touch to show our love, like holding hands, touching as we pass by each other in the kitchen, for example, and also throughout the night, as we sleep. We often have arms around each other, legs intertwined, or even just feet or toes touching as an expression of love.

Nurturing any relationship is basically being able to get as much of what one person wants while still giving the other person as much of what they want.   

Click here for a quiz to find out your primary love language.

Q: Tell us about a particularly memorable romantic evening/trip/date night. What stands out most in your mind and why?

We live, work and play together, and we’ve been doing this for many years.  We are fortunate that we have just the right combination of similarities to be able to easily have a lot of fun being together and yet, we are still two completely, different individuals. 

One of us is naturally an introvert, and the other is more of an extrovert.  One of us is a morning person, the other is naturally a night owl. Maintaining a relationship means that we must compromise and stretch outside of our natural tendencies. 

Couples are often challenged to maintain a relationship with a difference in sex drives, or have differing styles of sexual enjoyment. No matter the challenge, the same still holds true. Compromise. Communicate. Compromise. Communicate. Discover and share what is true for you.  Listen, with curiosity and interest, to what is your partner’s truth. Find a point of compromise. And if you need support in finding that middle ground, get help from someone outside of the relationship (perhaps a professional counsellor, someone who is capable of helping you).

We just recently decided to step up to a whole new level of intimacy by enlisting the support of a sensuality coach. In this latest endeavour, we are discovering our sexual blueprints to help us to better get our own desires met and to be able to feed the desires of our partner. Coupled with this work, we are also learning about passionate sexuality and deeper love, gaining greater intimacy and having even better sex. 

Click here to find out more.

5. Share a particularly memorable date/trip.  What stands out and why?

We love experiences, and (we’d like to think) we are pretty adventurous. We recently got married and, in our vows, we made a commitment to each other to have fun (frequently), travel even more, and try new things. What stands out as a particularly memorable date is actually our wedding. 

After being together for years, we wanted it to be an epic celebration. Something that focused on surprising our guests with a truly unique, unexpected and immersive experience. We rented a multi-million-dollar mansion for the weekend, hired actors, belly dancers, an artist to paint portraits, musicians, singers and a DJ.  We set a theme and encouraged guests to go wild and have fun dressing to that theme. Guests were taken through 3 unconventional days of dancing, eating and being entertained. They loved it.  We loved it too! It was so much fun. To this day, we still hear from guests that it was THE best wedding they have ever attended!

6. What advice do you have for busy couples who are struggling to make time for one another?

Time together feeds the relationship. It’s important. It’s a busy world and maintaining an intimate connection in a relationship with a hectic schedule can be challenging.  Oftentimes we can feel like we don’t even have enough time for our own self-care and paying attention to someone else can easily feel overwhelming. We operate from the understanding that all relationships go through stages. Knowing this, we can better recognize and navigate the challenges that come up for us.  

In the beginning stage of any relationship there is attraction and romance. Everything is new and lusty. Sadly, we cannot maintain this level of fantasy, and inevitably, reality will eventually end this “high”. 

What often comes next is that we start to see the flaws, and behaviours we may not like. This is often where relationships end. At this stage, we are being asked to strengthen our communication and trust if we are to get to the deeper stages of stability and commitment in our relationship. Statistically, few couples, married or not, don’t make it to this deeper stage. Understandably; it’s HARD work. It takes a lot of work to navigate some of these differences.

We suggest that couples cuddle up and discussing ideas of things that they are curious about, things they’d like to try. Decide on ways to have fun together, ways to spice things up in a different way.  Go dancing; it will literally get you closer. We’ll often go to a lifestyle club just to dance! Or try something a little more edgy, like a different theme at a lifestyle event, club or resort.  Go get openly sexy with each other in a safe environment like Oasis Aqualounge. Just make sure to set boundaries before choosing to add others into your playtime. And if you’re not sure where to start, listen to podcasts together.  It’ll start the discussion. There’s lots of great content available to educate, entertain, and inspire your desires. 

Remember, relationships are a constant play session in progress!

Is there anything else you would like to share with our readers?

In case you may be wondering why there are no faces in our pictures, it’s because we still need to practice a level of discretion in a society that has not yet fully embraced all the benefits of the sub-community of consensual non-monogamy.

 One day it won’t be this way, and in the meantime, we look forward to connecting with you in person at events, and online on social media.  We love meeting people.

We’d love it if you’d join our Torrid Souls Tribe. Listen in and let our ‘smexy’ (smart + sexy) conversations open your minds (and your legs) just a wee bit wider. 

Check out www.TorridSouls.com/links for the ways to find, and contact us.  Just know that we are mostly on Twitter, Instagram and Patreon.

To find out about our travels, our podcast and us, visit our website at: www.TorridSouls.com 

Adult Entertainer Ashton Blake Is Cumming in 2020

Oasis Aqualounge is a sexually-charged, water-themed adult playground that embraces a sexually-liberated and non-judgmental environment. W encourage people (and women, in particular) to live our their fantasies, desires and to bring more pleasure to their lives. We also love to welcome adult talent to the club, to perform live for our guests and/or to shoot porn during our monthly Money Shot event.

Marketing Director/Event Producer Fatima Mechtab recently interviewed Ashton Blake; a cam model and Brazzers porn star. Ashton Blake has plans to visit Oasis Aqualounge in 2020 for an exciting and interactive event and we are wet with excitement! Until then, we invite you to learn more about Ashton, for a taste of what’s to cum. If you are an adult entertainment and would live to discuss performing at Oasis Aqualounge, please email info@oasisaqualounge.com, attention Fatima M, for more details.

Cam model and porn star Ashton Blake will be visiting Oasis Aqualounge in 2020, Toronto, Canada. Stay tuned for exciting updates.

Q: Tell us a little more about you and your career in the adult industry. How did you get started?

A: I started as a cam girl.  Brazzers then contacted me to see if I would be interested in filming.  

Q: What was your first porn experience like?

A: My first video was with Brazzers.  I was extremely nervous.  Never traveled in my life.  I can admit I wasn’t much of an actress.  

Q: What is your favorite part of being an adult entertainer?

A: I have  pushed my boundaries with sexual interests.  I don’t think that I would have considered a gang bang before filming for the adult industry.

Q: Tell us about some of your upcoming projects.

A: I am in the process of creating content for my OnlyFans.com/TheRealAshtonBlake.  

Cam model & porn star Ashton Blake will be visiting Oasis Aqualounge in 2020, in Toronto, Canada. Stay tuned for exciting updates

Q: In your opinion, do you feel that sex clubs like Oasis Aqualounge could be helpful to those looking to explore themselves? If so, why?

A: I visited my first swing club when I was in my twenties.  I don’t know at that time I knew what my interests were, but I think over time, you start to ask yourself questions that create your boundaries, that fit into your lifestyle.  Clubs like Oasis Aqualounge help people to discover what their interests are and what they hope they can be.

Q: What advice would you give to those who are interested in the adult industry?

A: It is a lot of work, not just fucking.  Remember, this is your career so it will become a regular part of life.  Being honest with yourself and family helps to create solid living, lifestyle

Q: Name a favorite part(s) of your body and why?

A: I hate to pick one thing.  I consider myself the whole package.  Why settle for one part?

Cam model and porn star Ashton Blake is visiting Oasis Aqualounge in 2020, in Toronto, Canada. Stay tuned for exciting updates.

Q: What is your favorite way to relax when you have down time?

A: Sitting by the pool relaxing with a Titos and soda.  People watching and hanging out with friends.

Q: What is a belief that you live by, every day?

A: Life is short.  Enjoy each moment and learn from it.  

Interview with Madison Banes from Naked News

Oasis Aqualounge is a sexually-charged, water-themed adult playground that embraces a clothing-optional policy. We want our guests to feel sexy in their own skin and we encourage those who enjoy being naked to proudly flaunt and show off their bodies. Feeling comfortable and confident in one’s body is one step towards having a satisfying sex life.

Marketing Director/Event Producer Fatima Mechtab recently interviewed Madison Banes; a Naked News anchor, yoga instructor and proud nudist. Madison Banes held a photo shoot at Oasis Aqualounge back in August 2019, for a collaborative project between Naked News and Playboy Magazine, called ‘Behind The Lenz,’ with photographer Anthony Randall.

Madison Banes held a photo shoot at Oasis Aqualounge for a collaborative project with Naked News & Playboy Magazine
Oasis Aqualounge pool. Credit: Anthony Randall

Q: Tell us a little more about you!  What are your favorite hobbies or interests?

A: My favorite hobby is yoga. I’m also a yoga instructor! I also enjoy Burlesque, theater (and) any type of dance.

Q: When did you first start to model nude? What was your first shoot like?

A: I first started modeling nude when i joined the Naked News team. I had never even done nude modeling prior. Once I started with Naked News, my first shoot was with Shawn McPhearson; the photos were used as promotion for Naked News. Since then, I have traveled all over the world with modeling. Belize is still my favorite spot to shoot abroad; those pictures, I still use today. 

Madison Banes held a photo shoot at Oasis Aqualounge for a collaborative project with Naked News & Playboy Magazine
Oasis Aqualounge. Credit: Anthony Randall

Q: What is your favorite part of being nude?

A: Everything! I love being free. It’s taken me along time to be comfortable with my body and I still have moments of discomfort; i think we all do. To me, being naked is sense of empowerment and grounding. Its reminds me that we are all the same and of the same parts. It allows you to be more than (just) labels or the “cool trend.” To me, being naked is ‘bringing yourself back to (you)self.’

Q: What is ‘Behind The Lenz?’ How did you become involved?

A: ‘Behind the Lenz’ is a Naked News segment where a model and photographer collaborate for Playboy (or sometimes other magazines). The whole thing is recorded by our camera crew and then put on the air, for our viewers.  My producer asked me if i wanted to be a model and the rest is history. I worked with Anthony Randall and got some amazing photos at Osasis Aqualounge!

Madison Banes held a photo shoot at Oasis Aqualounge for a collaborative project with Naked News & Playboy Magazine
Oasis Aqualounge pool. Credit: Anthony Randall

Q: This shoot was recently held at Oasis Aqualounge. In your opinion, do you feel that sex clubs like Oasis Aqualounge could be helpful to those looking to explore themselves? If so, why?

A: This was not my first time at Oasis and it definitely won’t be my last! The atmosphere is not like any sex club I’ve ever been to. The relaxing setting really allows for anyone and everyone to touch on their boundaries and explore. The pool really creates such a chill vibe. Put it this way; I brought my ex girlfriend for her first experience and she is a conservative human. She had no issues getting comfortable and we had a night to remember!

Q: What advice would you give to those who are interested in nude modelling?

A: DO IT! You wont know if you like it, until you try! Just make sure that the first time you are with a photographer that you trust and that you are in control of your photos. Don’t do it for the wrong reasons; it should be for you!

Q: Name a favorite part(s) of your body and why?

A: My lips! I’ve always been told that I have great lips. I think I’m going to have to agree. Oh and my butt, sometimes… with the rights angles!

Q: What is a belief that you live by, every day?

A: Breathe. Everyone is doing the best they can with the knowledge they have. it’s not an easy one but it is the truest one for me. It helps me focus on the fact that humans think differently but its based on their own understanding, resulting in their own cultures, social structures and beliefs. 

If you are an erotic model and/or a proud nudist who is looking to be featured on the Oasis Aqualounge blog page, please email info@oasisaqualounge.com, attention Fatima Mechtab.